Youthful Challenges and Early Encounters

It is not easy being the author of your own 'being' because we have nobody to blame but ourselves, no matter how hard we protest, for who and what we are. At the same time there are many occurrences in life that shape us and mold us as we struggle to become mature and responsible.

On the west side of our property on Rockland Road, in Saint John N.B. where I grew up, was a rather bleak, but prominent rocky peak. It provided an excellent view of the lower city and the harbour beyond. My father decided it was an excellent location for a flag pole. A flag, elevated on this bare rock, would be visible for miles around. Since my dad was in the plumbing business it was only natural that the pole be constructed of three inch water pipe welded together, and set into a cement foundation. The ball at the top of the pole was shiny, brass coloured, fluted toilet-bowl float! From a distance it beautifully reflected the sun's rays and appeared as if it were made of pure gold. No one guessed its humble origin. Our stunning Canadian flag did not exist then, so it was the Union Jack that flew proudly from that vantage point for many years. Or so I thought at the time! It was my responsibility as a young boy to see that it fluttered there on special occasions. I performed this duty with great pride. To this day I am not sure if the pole, with its toilet-float topping, was simply a reasonable way for dad to construct a flag pole, or whether it was another form of Irish-Catholic protest. He was, after all, a very practical man!

In retrospect, in those early days, I did not realize that there were many competing ideas scrambling for my attention: Catholic/Protestant; Irish/English; virtue/sin; boys/girls; war/peace; authority/obedience etc. Somehow or other I learned to live with these ambivalent concepts not fully understanding how they were effecting my life. It was only later that I began to sort through it all and draw my own conclusions. But taking on these apparent conflicting ideas required at the same time, a willingness to give up one position for another. And there in my view, rests the true meaning of dialogue. Today, I rarely engage in a discussion or argument if I perceive the other is unwilling to change, or indeed if I am still fixated and closed about the subject myself. But in the end it requires an open mind and at least a willingness to live side-by-side, not like pieces of coal in a coal bin or children in a sand box, but respecting the other for who they are and what they believe. It is not, for example, believers against atheists, but believers and atheists respecting each other, and moving forward in dialogue and compromise. It is simply allowing others to be.

It is not an easy road, but very challenging. Yet as Socrates once said: "The unexamined life is not worth living".

Perhaps, after all, my dad's flag pole was that symbol of compromise leading to peace!

And that's Dick's View of the World this Week.