'ME People' and Empathy.

The other day Maureen and I were driving home from the mall and, for some reason or other, I began mumbling about some of the  'ME people' we have met along the way. (Was it not TIME Magazine that called the Baby Boomers the 'ME Generation'?) There must have been something in the movie we had just enjoyed that ignited this conversation. I say 'ME people' because there are those who seem to have a need to talk incessantly about themselves and to relate tales of their wonderful accomplishments. Now I always believed that this constant regurgitation of past achievements, no matter how poorly remembered, was the jurisdiction of octogenarians like myself! When I look in the mirror I realize that those who have only come to know me in my waning years must wonder how I ever achieved anything worth remembering! 

In high-school, not being a great academic, I found escape in sports. I know today's parents often go to the arena to watch their children play hockey in the local league. My mother encouraged me to play sports and often gave me advice. I remember her telling me if I wanted to be a good hockey player, I had to become a great skater first. But my parents never were able to go to that cold and damp Saint John Forum to watch me play.  That saddened me at the time.

We all need to be proud of what we have accomplished and true friends want to share our successes....I think! But it's the constant need by some to dominate the conversation, often repetitively, about "how great they are". We both wondered what motivates this unnecessary recitation of past hornswoggle.

My first thought was this behaviour is characteristic of teen-agers, that is once they get past the "Yep" and "OK" period of  meaningful discussion! Could it be some people do not manage to get beyond that stage in life? Perhaps just a fragile self-esteem or the need to keep the attention focused on them is the motivating factor. Whatever the cause, it is difficult to maintain any real relationship with someone who is constantly hogging the conversation and orating the same tales repetitiously.

Now I must confess I do like to tell friends about some of the places I have been or of some important personalities I have met along the way. But I think I only do that, not to indicate how 'important' I was or am, but simply because the stories fit into the immediate conversation. Besides, what else are you going to talk about, except of course those who are absent!

Back in my teens and college days (here I go!!) there was always somebody who got picked on. Like the poor student who went home for the week-end and the boys dismantled his Volkswagen Bug and re-assembled it the third floor dorm! What is it about those individuals that invite such putrilage behaviour? Simply because they are boring? What has happened to empathy? Why not give them a break and try to understand their position or baring that, find an excuse to move away. Perhaps this age of violence has exhausted our supply of empathy. Meanwhile, I will try to listen and show some interest in their effort to be heard.

With Robert Louis Stevenson I say: "All my old opinions were only stages on the way to the one I now hold, as itself is only a stage on the way to something else." 

And that's Dick's View of the World this Week