Different Faces - Different Views

Ideas and Faces

Benjamin Franklin, one of the Founding Fathers of the United States said, "The opinions of men are almost as various as their faces."(An Apology for Printers) When more people recognize this perhaps there would be less violence in the world! I know I am dreaming once again. But would it not be a very dull world if we all looked the same and thought the same thoughts! Having different opinions and different faces is the 'stuff' that makes life worth living. The problem, on the other hand, is that so many of us get locked into our own views. Some who are not willing to talk about their opinions, or discuss them with others, simply walk away - but I suspect both parties lose. On the other hand, healthy intercourse can lead to change and harmony.

Oops, there is that old fashioned word again, and it may lead to a misunderstanding, especially when it appears in A Dick's View! The second meaning of intercourse has been reduced to a much smaller word beginning with "F" - a lot easier to spell and is usually accompanied by strong emotion! But when I was growing up dealings between persons or groups was called intercourse. And I think it is still is the first meaning of the word. So I am safe in saying that the world could use a lot more intercourse if we are ever going to resolve personal and public conflicts. It might makes things a little better if some people could change their faces as well!

What I find curious as I grow older is why do we get hocked on our views? Why is it so difficult to change views and opinions? Or why is it so difficult to get others to see things my way?

I have come to the conclusion, rightly or wrongly, it is because we don't think only with our brains. We reason, and perhaps form our opinions, with our feelings and emotions as well. I have, in my mis-spent youth, attempted many times to change another person's opinion or view of the world only to fail. I am sure I put forth a fantastic argument based on facts and facts alone! No luck! Could it be that formulating our view of the world we are influenced by our history, our culture, our life experiences and our emotions. We have learned what works for us and what does not work. It reminds me of a bird building it's own little nest to live in. Then someone comes along and wants to pull twigs and sticks out of our little virtual home!

Clinging to our ideas and values then is like building a wall to protect ourselves, to make us feel good about ourselves and so we close our minds to making any real change. No doubt there is also the fear that if we hold opinions that differ from those of our peers and neighbours we will not be accepted any longer by that person or in that community. Besides we all know that if we change ideas too often we will appear fickle, or indecisive. So, no matter  how brilliant my argument, the other person remains firm and unconvinced.

What Will I Do?

I have heard the expression 'cognitive dissonance' and think it means there is conflict between what you know and what you do. Or something comes along that challenges a strong belief you have held all your life. Someone who smokes knowing at the same time smoking can be a cause of cancer.  Holding a strong religious or moral belief all your life and then being forced to confront it because of a change of circumstance or a new understanding of the world around you. Cognitive dissonance causes very uncomfortable feelings and emotions that challenge our status quo.

So even if I am a firm believer in more intercourse, I also know that each one of us finds it very difficult to disrupt ourselves. It is easier in the end to remain fixated and steadfast in our own view of the world. But we all can learn to give a little, to throw open the windows of our humble self images and breath in the fresh air of ideas, insights, beliefs and opinions that really do make life worth living. Just look at all the faces on the subway, and realize there are just as many unique ideas sitting on the benches or hanging from the hand rails.

And that's Dick's View of the World this Week